Things are good here, me thinks. Just had a really great Thanksgiving dinner that I whipped up (and am STILL eating on 3 days later lol). I'm hoping that this time next year will be drastically different in that i will be self employed fulltime, newly preggers and maybe not cooking the entire meal but visiting fam or friends for the holiday and just relaxing and basking my newfound glow (cue singing birds and hopping bunny rabbits lol). I get overwhelmed with everything I have to do between then and now so I try not to ruminate on it so much lol.
As far as my eating plan, its been going ok, but I could step it up. Ive been taking the 2 brazil nuts a day, lots of raw milk and grass-fed butter, i had sardines last week and ive been taking half my magnesium supplement dose that i need about daily (i suck at swallowing pills so this is huge for me lol). Ive been keeping the chicken broth coming, pastured meats and an egg a day (sorta). But ive been slipping on going to the gym (*cough* havent gone yet*cough*), getting my fish, cod liver oil, chicken liver, oysters and salmon roe in and doing my daily quiet/prayer time. But hey, everyday is a new day to try again right?
But I gotta get serious about this baby stuff, Im now 32 and truly, really, i REALLY wanna be pregnant or at least trying by this time next year. FA SERIOUS. My biological clock isnt ticking, it has exploded already lol.
There has been a small baby book in my dept at work and its been kinda awkward to watch these ladies get pregnant, go through pregnancy, have their babies, go on maternity leave and show off their babies and then return. One lady in particular i felt severely...i dunno...jealous of, i dunno and i dont even really talk to her like that but for some reason, when she came in with her husband and newborn i was HIGHLY umcomfortable...like wanted to go cry uncomfortable. Maybe I was ovulating, i dunno. But that SUCKED. I dont need to be jealous of anyone...anything that they have, I can have and then some, i know that. But LAWD my ovaries were PISSED! lol Like, I dont even wanna be around a newborn or hold a newborn, or even give the precious pennies I have away for someone else's baby shower (that im not close with anyway). The way ive reasoned it is the only baby I wanna coo over, cradle and support with my monies IS MY OWN BABY. PERIOD. That sounds really nasty and petty dont it? But thas how I feel. Dont get me wrong, im really happy for these women, they are my age (which probably makes me feel even more a way about it lol), they are lovely women and their babies are gorgeous, but someone who has literally been in baby lust FOR YEARS, I have little patience for celebrating others' bundles of joy. Im hoping this changes once we have our own, cause WOOO, i feel like a b****! lol Smh.
Any other Pre-TTCers go through this?
November 27, 2011
October 29, 2011
Get prepared
Thas what dropped into my spirit today. Sounds woo-woo, but I'm a believer so, yea lol. Sooooo, let me go ahead and drop in my fertility eating plans so I at least know where to go when I need to be reminded.
I'm a planner by default and a preparer anyway but this motherhood thing is like THE tallest mountain. Like, tryna fathom bringing another human being in this world through my body is THE most surreal, out of this world thing I can imagine. But yet, I am SO ready to do it.
So, here I am, on the cusp, as it were. We aren't ready to start trying TONIGHT (well, he is but I aint lol) but like i said, I need to get ready, cause hey, I cant plan EVERYTHING. ;)
My usual diet is pretty clean in that I try to limit processed foods, IF im in the grocery store, I shop the parameter, but I usually shop at the farmer's market and straight from the farm. I dont subscribe to the ever popular Lipid Hypothesis, so i eat pretty high fat, including lots of animal fats. So for the fertility eating, its very high fat, very fish rich, organ meat rich, rich in general because basically I am building the nutrient stores that my baby will conceive and begin grow in.
Preconception care and planning in the US is just starved (literally and figuratively) but if you look to any other country and traditional culture in the world, they do THE MOST to prepare a couple to conceive including saving some of the most sacred foods for them to eat in order to conceive. Those foods include foods from the sea, organ meats (think liver, heart, kidney, etc), and full fat dairy and eggs during the high grass season in the spring. Some cultures would not even let a couple marry until this particular time of year JUST so that they could be shored up with eating these things in time to marry. Even if the tribe was land locked, they would travel and barter and negotiate with sea faring tribes for the coveted seafood.
So I am MOST definitely gonna get my eat on. Along with creating a great environment to creating a baby, some lifestyles changes will also help. Of COURSE keeping fit is numero uno behind a great diet in building a healthy baby as well as keeping my health going once I do conceive. SOOO many women either dont work out or STOP working out once they begin TTCing because they been told or believe that that would hurt the baby. NOT SOOO! I can go on about this but, keeping fit is KEY (also, Kegels are not the end all, be all, ladies). Also keeping stress down (you got to pray just to make it today! lol), minimizing environmental toxins (Mr. Clean is NOT the business!), and possibly taking supplements (prenatals are ok, but are mostly peed out lol. Whole food, slow releasing supplements are a bit better.) are also super important.
Anywho, here I go, here's my eating plan on the road to TTCing:
homemade chicken broth daily
homemade milk kefir daily
green salad w/veggies with plenty of EVOO (for vitamin E) based dressing daily
chicken liver mousse (shouts out to Julia Child) at least twice a week
coconut oil fudge piece daily (yum!)
fermented Cod liver oil daily (at least a teaspoon)
Brazil nuts ONLY 1 or 2 each day for selenium
Lemon juice, fresh squeezed, 1 tsp. in every glass of water or smoothie (cleansing and ph balancing)
Raw local honey, 1 Tbls at bedtime.
1 egg a day at least (WITH the yolk, runny please, yum!)
Red Raspberry Leaf Infusions, 1 cup per day.
Nettle Leaf Infusions (i'll probably change this to Red clover once ready to conceive), 1 cup per day.
Wild Alaskan Salmon, at least once a week.
Sardines in olive oil at least once a week
Oysters at least once a week
Fresh clams at least once a month
lots of grass-fed butter (preferably raw)
lots of grass-fed cream (preferably raw) - can you say ICE CREAM! lol
lots of raw milk
some grass-fed cheese (preferably raw)
consume salmon roe at least once every couple weeks
sweetbreads (organ meats) when I can
grass-fed/pastured meats (beef, chicken, pork, lamb, turkey)
filtered water
Some environmental/lifestyle changes needed are
GET MY BUTT BACK IN THE DANGED GYM! lol - if i do this right, I can be gorgeous in time for bikini season lol
Epsom salt baths for the sulfate once a week
filtered shower and bath tub faucets
daily prayer/quiet time
magnesium supplements (supposedly also reduces body order and deepens your sleep!)
folate supplement (cause i know im not gonna eat perfect)
Ok, so I think thas it, as far as the road to motherhood goes. I hope I can incorporate all of this and keep it up until we are ready to try! (hopefully by this time next year, yikes! lol)
I'm a planner by default and a preparer anyway but this motherhood thing is like THE tallest mountain. Like, tryna fathom bringing another human being in this world through my body is THE most surreal, out of this world thing I can imagine. But yet, I am SO ready to do it.
So, here I am, on the cusp, as it were. We aren't ready to start trying TONIGHT (well, he is but I aint lol) but like i said, I need to get ready, cause hey, I cant plan EVERYTHING. ;)
My usual diet is pretty clean in that I try to limit processed foods, IF im in the grocery store, I shop the parameter, but I usually shop at the farmer's market and straight from the farm. I dont subscribe to the ever popular Lipid Hypothesis, so i eat pretty high fat, including lots of animal fats. So for the fertility eating, its very high fat, very fish rich, organ meat rich, rich in general because basically I am building the nutrient stores that my baby will conceive and begin grow in.
Preconception care and planning in the US is just starved (literally and figuratively) but if you look to any other country and traditional culture in the world, they do THE MOST to prepare a couple to conceive including saving some of the most sacred foods for them to eat in order to conceive. Those foods include foods from the sea, organ meats (think liver, heart, kidney, etc), and full fat dairy and eggs during the high grass season in the spring. Some cultures would not even let a couple marry until this particular time of year JUST so that they could be shored up with eating these things in time to marry. Even if the tribe was land locked, they would travel and barter and negotiate with sea faring tribes for the coveted seafood.
So I am MOST definitely gonna get my eat on. Along with creating a great environment to creating a baby, some lifestyles changes will also help. Of COURSE keeping fit is numero uno behind a great diet in building a healthy baby as well as keeping my health going once I do conceive. SOOO many women either dont work out or STOP working out once they begin TTCing because they been told or believe that that would hurt the baby. NOT SOOO! I can go on about this but, keeping fit is KEY (also, Kegels are not the end all, be all, ladies). Also keeping stress down (you got to pray just to make it today! lol), minimizing environmental toxins (Mr. Clean is NOT the business!), and possibly taking supplements (prenatals are ok, but are mostly peed out lol. Whole food, slow releasing supplements are a bit better.) are also super important.
Anywho, here I go, here's my eating plan on the road to TTCing:
homemade chicken broth daily
homemade milk kefir daily
green salad w/veggies with plenty of EVOO (for vitamin E) based dressing daily
chicken liver mousse (shouts out to Julia Child) at least twice a week
coconut oil fudge piece daily (yum!)
fermented Cod liver oil daily (at least a teaspoon)
Brazil nuts ONLY 1 or 2 each day for selenium
Lemon juice, fresh squeezed, 1 tsp. in every glass of water or smoothie (cleansing and ph balancing)
Raw local honey, 1 Tbls at bedtime.
1 egg a day at least (WITH the yolk, runny please, yum!)
Red Raspberry Leaf Infusions, 1 cup per day.
Nettle Leaf Infusions (i'll probably change this to Red clover once ready to conceive), 1 cup per day.
Wild Alaskan Salmon, at least once a week.
Sardines in olive oil at least once a week
Oysters at least once a week
Fresh clams at least once a month
lots of grass-fed butter (preferably raw)
lots of grass-fed cream (preferably raw) - can you say ICE CREAM! lol
lots of raw milk
some grass-fed cheese (preferably raw)
consume salmon roe at least once every couple weeks
sweetbreads (organ meats) when I can
grass-fed/pastured meats (beef, chicken, pork, lamb, turkey)
filtered water
Some environmental/lifestyle changes needed are
GET MY BUTT BACK IN THE DANGED GYM! lol - if i do this right, I can be gorgeous in time for bikini season lol
Epsom salt baths for the sulfate once a week
filtered shower and bath tub faucets
daily prayer/quiet time
magnesium supplements (supposedly also reduces body order and deepens your sleep!)
folate supplement (cause i know im not gonna eat perfect)
Ok, so I think thas it, as far as the road to motherhood goes. I hope I can incorporate all of this and keep it up until we are ready to try! (hopefully by this time next year, yikes! lol)
October 15, 2011
Im back!
So yea, the 30 days of blogging didnt work out, i guess i just need to get in the habit of blogging period, so maybe I will do that at another time.
At any rate, Ive been kinda in the rut as far as my baby bucket goals....i mean, ive been working on my business, but not really, i havent been tot he gym since before my last post (boooo!) and i havent started my sourdough starter (looking to start this weekend).
But say all this to say, hubby basically is like...baby ready. Basically, he let it be known that he's waiting on me. So now what do I do? Its like i get reminded about this every few months and then i feels like my life is NO WHERE NEAR READY.
But really, the only thing I want in place before a TTCing for a baby is getting my business profitable. I NEED to know that I can make my own money because ONCE I become pregnant, i fully plan on leaving corporate america. I cant imagine being pregnant, let alone the dreaded 1st trimester!, and dealing with stresses, frustrations, and silliness of working for someone else. I KNOW that people all around the world do this all day everyday but *I* dont want to be one of them lol. There are/were pregnant ladies in my office, hell im covering for one right now until she returns from maternity leave. There have been an odd amount of preterm and even STILL birth going on and i wonder if our work environment has anything to do with that. My job SAYS that they support families, but we JUST got a dedicated lactation room and there is still no real maternity OR paternity leave...you just have to take short term disability (since when is birthing a child a disability?). Then once they drop the baby, they get bothered here and there while they are out on maternity leave and more often than not, these women come back early out of fear or...whatever from leave only to plop their beautiful baby at home with whomever or in the nearest daycare to start the hectic life of juggling corporate america and family life (cause the two SUCK in America at blending well). There are some that do this dance seemlessly and every parenting while working choice has its advantages and drawbacks, I just so happen to like the drawbacks of being self-employed better than working in corporate america.
Sooo yea, here I am, broody with nowhere to go, lol. I gotta get in the gym, i gotta start eating better, I gotta relieve my stress and I gotta become profitable at my biz. That is the order for the rest of 2011. Hopefully, this time next year, we will have a lil mtoto hanging out in my belly :D
At any rate, Ive been kinda in the rut as far as my baby bucket goals....i mean, ive been working on my business, but not really, i havent been tot he gym since before my last post (boooo!) and i havent started my sourdough starter (looking to start this weekend).
But say all this to say, hubby basically is like...baby ready. Basically, he let it be known that he's waiting on me. So now what do I do? Its like i get reminded about this every few months and then i feels like my life is NO WHERE NEAR READY.
But really, the only thing I want in place before a TTCing for a baby is getting my business profitable. I NEED to know that I can make my own money because ONCE I become pregnant, i fully plan on leaving corporate america. I cant imagine being pregnant, let alone the dreaded 1st trimester!, and dealing with stresses, frustrations, and silliness of working for someone else. I KNOW that people all around the world do this all day everyday but *I* dont want to be one of them lol. There are/were pregnant ladies in my office, hell im covering for one right now until she returns from maternity leave. There have been an odd amount of preterm and even STILL birth going on and i wonder if our work environment has anything to do with that. My job SAYS that they support families, but we JUST got a dedicated lactation room and there is still no real maternity OR paternity leave...you just have to take short term disability (since when is birthing a child a disability?). Then once they drop the baby, they get bothered here and there while they are out on maternity leave and more often than not, these women come back early out of fear or...whatever from leave only to plop their beautiful baby at home with whomever or in the nearest daycare to start the hectic life of juggling corporate america and family life (cause the two SUCK in America at blending well). There are some that do this dance seemlessly and every parenting while working choice has its advantages and drawbacks, I just so happen to like the drawbacks of being self-employed better than working in corporate america.
Sooo yea, here I am, broody with nowhere to go, lol. I gotta get in the gym, i gotta start eating better, I gotta relieve my stress and I gotta become profitable at my biz. That is the order for the rest of 2011. Hopefully, this time next year, we will have a lil mtoto hanging out in my belly :D
August 20, 2011
30 Day challenge
Ok, i really need to get back on my grind with this blog, lol. Life has been going on, a lil better, but still a long way to go, but hey baby steps are cool right? lol
Anyway, i thought i'd participate in this 30 day blog challenge that is going around to get me in the habit of blogging because i think it would be really beneficial to me and to the future me to see how far Ive come. Anyway, here's what to expect:
Day 1 – A photo of yourself and a description of how your day was.
Day 2 – A photo of something you ate today.
Day 3 – Your idea of the perfect first date.
Day 4 – Your favorite photograph of your best friend.
Day 5 – A photo of yourself two years ago.
Day 6 – A photo of an animal you’d love to keep as a pet.
Day 7 – Your dream wedding.
Day 8 – A song to match your mood.
Day 9 – A photo of the item you last purchased.
Day 10 – A photo of your favorite place to eat.
Day 11 – What’s in your makeup bag?
Day 12 – A photograph of the town you live in.
Day 13 – Your favorite musician and why?
Day 14 – A TV show you’re currently addicted to.
Day 15 – Something you don’t leave the house without.
Day 16 – Your celebrity crush.
Day 17 – A photo of you and your family.
Day 18 – Something you crave a lot.
Day 19 – Another picture of yourself.
Day 20 – The meaning behind your blog name.
Day 21 – A photo of something that makes you happy.
Day 22 – A letter to someone who has hurt you recently. A letter to someone who broke my heart.
Day 23 – 15 facts about you.
Day 24 – A photo of something that means a lot to you.
Day 25 – What’s in your purse?
Day 26 – A photo of somewhere you’ve been to.
Day 27 – A picture of you last year and now and how have you changed since then?
Day 28 – Your favorite movie.
Day 29 – Something you could never get tired of doing.
Day 30 – A photograph of yourself today + three good things that have happened in the past 30 days.
Just a quick update on things with me, im still working my 9 to 5, pushing everyday with that, tryna keep the household running. I fell off from the gym so i gotta get back on that. Ive been falling off with cooking, so i DEFINITELY need to get back on that. But ive been making new friends with a local meetup group in my area, so thas a positive, ew thing that im doing. Also, ive been trying to visualize my life how I would it to be in the future and im doing my best to LIVE what i want to happen now. Im finally growing my hair out, decided to leave the barber alone, even tho she's great, and since hubby likes her, he may go back for beard trips, so i may use her for eyebrow maintenance, until i get better at it lol. There's a possible family reunion happening in South Carolina next summer for my family so I'd like to attend that (we shall see). Oh and sometime between now and the end of this year, we are gonna try and make our way to AZ to visit my in laws (another we shall see).
Anywho, ON with the 30 day blogging challenge! lol
Anyway, i thought i'd participate in this 30 day blog challenge that is going around to get me in the habit of blogging because i think it would be really beneficial to me and to the future me to see how far Ive come. Anyway, here's what to expect:
Day 1 – A photo of yourself and a description of how your day was.
Day 2 – A photo of something you ate today.
Day 3 – Your idea of the perfect first date.
Day 4 – Your favorite photograph of your best friend.
Day 5 – A photo of yourself two years ago.
Day 6 – A photo of an animal you’d love to keep as a pet.
Day 7 – Your dream wedding.
Day 8 – A song to match your mood.
Day 9 – A photo of the item you last purchased.
Day 10 – A photo of your favorite place to eat.
Day 11 – What’s in your makeup bag?
Day 12 – A photograph of the town you live in.
Day 13 – Your favorite musician and why?
Day 14 – A TV show you’re currently addicted to.
Day 15 – Something you don’t leave the house without.
Day 16 – Your celebrity crush.
Day 17 – A photo of you and your family.
Day 18 – Something you crave a lot.
Day 19 – Another picture of yourself.
Day 20 – The meaning behind your blog name.
Day 21 – A photo of something that makes you happy.
Day 22 – A letter to someone who has hurt you recently. A letter to someone who broke my heart.
Day 23 – 15 facts about you.
Day 24 – A photo of something that means a lot to you.
Day 25 – What’s in your purse?
Day 26 – A photo of somewhere you’ve been to.
Day 27 – A picture of you last year and now and how have you changed since then?
Day 28 – Your favorite movie.
Day 29 – Something you could never get tired of doing.
Day 30 – A photograph of yourself today + three good things that have happened in the past 30 days.
Just a quick update on things with me, im still working my 9 to 5, pushing everyday with that, tryna keep the household running. I fell off from the gym so i gotta get back on that. Ive been falling off with cooking, so i DEFINITELY need to get back on that. But ive been making new friends with a local meetup group in my area, so thas a positive, ew thing that im doing. Also, ive been trying to visualize my life how I would it to be in the future and im doing my best to LIVE what i want to happen now. Im finally growing my hair out, decided to leave the barber alone, even tho she's great, and since hubby likes her, he may go back for beard trips, so i may use her for eyebrow maintenance, until i get better at it lol. There's a possible family reunion happening in South Carolina next summer for my family so I'd like to attend that (we shall see). Oh and sometime between now and the end of this year, we are gonna try and make our way to AZ to visit my in laws (another we shall see).
Anywho, ON with the 30 day blogging challenge! lol
July 17, 2011
Spotlight on baby bucket list item: Launch business
So I figured that since I put up my baby bucket list, i could elaborate on the things that are on the list and why I included them.
So the item that I am spotlighting today is launch my business. To me, this is one of the most important items on my list....in fact, its one of the requisite items there. I'm not going to go into what my business is (if you wanna know that, im blogging about it here) but instead i want to talk about why I deem it so important.
So yea, i included launching my own business on my baby bucket list primarily because I want to be a WAHM (work at home mom)...and moreover a WAH family. I dont want to have to deal with paltry maternity leaves and expensive daycare and being sad all day at work while i miss my baby and hoping that the daycare provider I hired treats my baby well while Im away and having to choose between my career and family all the time and on and on and on. I am very much a proponent of doing for yourself instead of flitting from job to job hoping that someone else will pay you for the lifestyle you want.
I want to be able to create, maintain and pass on a legacy to my children and hopefully grandchildren and to me a job does not do that. My views may seem particularly strong on this issue because other than being on my baby bucket list, launching my own business is just one of my life goals, period. I guess I just feel particularly resentful of the whole go to school, get good grades, graduate college, work a job until you die (cause there really is no such thing as retirement from a job) paradigm. Its been proven over and over that it doesnt work and I want to show my children better things (this commercial illustrates the way i feel perfectly lol)
So yea, if you'd like to hear more of my beautiful rantings on that you can visit my other blog, but that is why I have it on my bucket list. I'd like to have it up and running before we TTC so that should we be so blessed to conceive sooner than later, I can leave my job. Also, launching my business is a huge part of my financial preparations for having a family.
What are your financial goals for TTCing? Are they included on your baby bucket list?
So the item that I am spotlighting today is launch my business. To me, this is one of the most important items on my list....in fact, its one of the requisite items there. I'm not going to go into what my business is (if you wanna know that, im blogging about it here) but instead i want to talk about why I deem it so important.
So yea, i included launching my own business on my baby bucket list primarily because I want to be a WAHM (work at home mom)...and moreover a WAH family. I dont want to have to deal with paltry maternity leaves and expensive daycare and being sad all day at work while i miss my baby and hoping that the daycare provider I hired treats my baby well while Im away and having to choose between my career and family all the time and on and on and on. I am very much a proponent of doing for yourself instead of flitting from job to job hoping that someone else will pay you for the lifestyle you want.
I want to be able to create, maintain and pass on a legacy to my children and hopefully grandchildren and to me a job does not do that. My views may seem particularly strong on this issue because other than being on my baby bucket list, launching my own business is just one of my life goals, period. I guess I just feel particularly resentful of the whole go to school, get good grades, graduate college, work a job until you die (cause there really is no such thing as retirement from a job) paradigm. Its been proven over and over that it doesnt work and I want to show my children better things (this commercial illustrates the way i feel perfectly lol)
So yea, if you'd like to hear more of my beautiful rantings on that you can visit my other blog, but that is why I have it on my bucket list. I'd like to have it up and running before we TTC so that should we be so blessed to conceive sooner than later, I can leave my job. Also, launching my business is a huge part of my financial preparations for having a family.
What are your financial goals for TTCing? Are they included on your baby bucket list?
July 16, 2011
My baby bucket list
So one of the things us baby-over-planners like to do is have a baby bucket list set up to help guide use along the road to pregnancy/motherhood. A baby bucket list is a list of all the things you want to experience and/or accomplish before you become pregnant with a baby. This is PERFECT for planners so that we can proudly check things off the list as we go....makes us feel accomplished and all that lol.
I'm going to start mine here. Keep in mind this list could be and has been much longer than it is and some of the items may be 'like-to's" (noted by a '*') than actual requirements of mine.
My Baby Bucket list (in no certain order)
Launch business
Pay off back taxes
Pay off car loan
Pay off credit cards
save baby fund and/or emergency fund
Get physically fit (become a lifting goddess YES! lol)
Shore up nutritional stores(up the FCLO, folate supplement, veggies and protein in general)
Get a puppy*
Read more black history/literature books*
establish a home church
make some new friends*
establish consistent bible study/prayer/devotion life with the Lord
strengthen marriage
I believe that if i at least make headway on each of these things through thr second half of this year, I will be well on my way to TTCing next July! Im so excited!
I'm going to start mine here. Keep in mind this list could be and has been much longer than it is and some of the items may be 'like-to's" (noted by a '*') than actual requirements of mine.
My Baby Bucket list (in no certain order)
Launch business
Pay off back taxes
Pay off car loan
Pay off credit cards
save baby fund and/or emergency fund
Get physically fit (become a lifting goddess YES! lol)
Shore up nutritional stores(up the FCLO, folate supplement, veggies and protein in general)
Get a puppy*
Read more black history/literature books*
establish a home church
make some new friends*
establish consistent bible study/prayer/devotion life with the Lord
strengthen marriage
I believe that if i at least make headway on each of these things through thr second half of this year, I will be well on my way to TTCing next July! Im so excited!
July 11, 2011
Hey there
Im up really late, but im on vacation so its cool lol. At any rate, im still kicking over here tho sadly nothin much has changed since my almost year old last update. Still broke, still no babies, still working, etc etc etc.
But now things are a slightly different.
I'm fed up with waiting. Im sick and tired of being sick and tired.
So I have given myself a deadline. TTCing by July 2012 or not at all. PERIOD. So basically, im giving myself the next 12 months to get my act together. And this can start tomorrow if I want to as I have a networking event to attend so that I can get the contacts I need to get my biz jumping.
Why this new resolve seeing as ive been baby lusting since 2006?
Well, its like this. I am slowly realizing that the life im living while is nice, is not the life I want. PERIOD. And to get the life I want, im gonna have to get uncomfortable. Im comfortable and I cant remain comfortable to bring about change.
Im tired of watching all my peers (and younger) creating the families they want. Cute lil babies left and right taunt me when i log onto my Facebook. My husband is pretty babyfied right now thanks to his SAHD friends who have been egging him on. His best friend and his wife still arent pregnant yet (that we know of), but im sure once that happens, all reproductive hell will break loose lol.
Im just tired. And being on this vacation for the last week has shown me just how tired ive become. Living my life the way I want to day to day has been darn near orgasmic. I cant believe how much better I feel and how much stuff I have the energy to do now that im home instead of up in a cold, stressful office all day. Not say that the stress factor wont rise at home once i get my biz going, but it will be MY stress. The stress that will get me free. And that I can and will live with, naamean?
Anywho, so yea...July 2012..I plan to be be baby dancing with the hubster. If he had his way, we'd baby dance now and he'd be SAHD galore, but, I cannt see myself leaving my baby all day, even if they are home with hubby (no offense to the WOHM's out there, ya'll rock!).
Now I just have to work backwards. Ive made a list of things that need to happen between now and July 2012, so that's a good starting point. Making it to this networking event tomorrow night is the next. Sigh, pray for me ya'll.
Baby steps, right? Heh. Right!
But now things are a slightly different.
I'm fed up with waiting. Im sick and tired of being sick and tired.
So I have given myself a deadline. TTCing by July 2012 or not at all. PERIOD. So basically, im giving myself the next 12 months to get my act together. And this can start tomorrow if I want to as I have a networking event to attend so that I can get the contacts I need to get my biz jumping.
Why this new resolve seeing as ive been baby lusting since 2006?
Well, its like this. I am slowly realizing that the life im living while is nice, is not the life I want. PERIOD. And to get the life I want, im gonna have to get uncomfortable. Im comfortable and I cant remain comfortable to bring about change.
Im tired of watching all my peers (and younger) creating the families they want. Cute lil babies left and right taunt me when i log onto my Facebook. My husband is pretty babyfied right now thanks to his SAHD friends who have been egging him on. His best friend and his wife still arent pregnant yet (that we know of), but im sure once that happens, all reproductive hell will break loose lol.
Im just tired. And being on this vacation for the last week has shown me just how tired ive become. Living my life the way I want to day to day has been darn near orgasmic. I cant believe how much better I feel and how much stuff I have the energy to do now that im home instead of up in a cold, stressful office all day. Not say that the stress factor wont rise at home once i get my biz going, but it will be MY stress. The stress that will get me free. And that I can and will live with, naamean?
Anywho, so yea...July 2012..I plan to be be baby dancing with the hubster. If he had his way, we'd baby dance now and he'd be SAHD galore, but, I cannt see myself leaving my baby all day, even if they are home with hubby (no offense to the WOHM's out there, ya'll rock!).
Now I just have to work backwards. Ive made a list of things that need to happen between now and July 2012, so that's a good starting point. Making it to this networking event tomorrow night is the next. Sigh, pray for me ya'll.
Baby steps, right? Heh. Right!
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